Aspergers in Love: Couple Relationships and Family Affairs by Maxine Aston

By Maxine Aston

Asperger Syndrome (AS) has usually been thought of to be incompatible with love and relationships, yet because the variety of diagnoses raises, it's turning into obvious that individuals with AS can and do have complete and intimate relationships. Maxine Aston frankly examines the elemental facets of relationships which are usually complex by way of the illness. Illustrated with real-life examples, the ebook tackles concerns resembling charm, belief, communique, intimacy and parenting and features a part on commonly asked questions, making it a needs to for all people with AS and their companions, in addition to for neighbors, relatives and counselors.

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Sample text

He did not particularly want to talk about anything else and so did not. In addition to wanting only to talk about subjects that interested them, some AS men do not talk because they are afraid that they will say the wrong thing, especially if the subject matter approaches the delicate topic of feelings or emotions. AS men deal with this fear in two different ways. Some get very angry and frustrated and use this in order to silence their partner. Others seem to shut down, a visible process that I have seen many times while talking to couples.

A long- term negative way of thinking can change how hard we try, and may eventually mean that, because we believe we will fail, we do not try at all. By the time the majority of us reach adulthood, we will normally have developed a sense of self and the capabilities we have. If we are criticized we can evaluate that criticism according to who said it and why, and the context it was said in. For example, if we are told we are not honest, we will think about why the person has said it and decide if it is true or if it is a biased comment.

If he thanked her last time she mentioned this to him, he will see no need to say it again. He is not constantly asking her to acknowledge him in what he does, so does not see why she needs him to acknowledge her. She may also think she has little to thank or praise him for as he never reciprocates her emotional caring and the empathy she shows him. If this pattern of behaviour is not broken or brought into the couple’s awareness it will soon start to have a very negative effect on both partners.

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